ChatGPT cannot write funny
So hire someone who can. You won’t regret it… Well, you might. Actually, you for sure will regret it. But not until much later, so just hire em.
Anyway, my point is that for all the traditional media hype and social media fear-mongering about how everyone is going to lose their jobs because ChatGPT is mere months away from sentience and just a few years away from total, global, geo-political domination via some as yet to be designed viral NFT bio-weapon, it is important to remember that artificial intelligence algorithms (as well as the frickin’ nerds behind their development) are not, and never will be, funny.
Don’t believe me, I asked ChatGPT to tell me what it thought “funny” was, and this is what it gave me:
“The emergent property society has labeled “funny” can be described or distinguished by unexpected or amusing commentary or situations typically inducing states of comicality or laughter. For example, like when small children randomly blurt out, ‘fuck’ and ‘oh, shit bitch’ in public in defiance of their parents’ earlier instructions; or when very old people fall down for no apparent reason; or when small children say ‘oh, shit bitch’ in response to some old people falling down for no apparent reason. That is “funny” ”
Actually, you know what, that is funny. Do you know why that’s funny? Because, I wrote that shit. ChatGPT’s ain’t funny like that. GPT couldn’t write funny if it’s algo depended on it.
This is what GPT actually gave me when I asked it what “funny” was…
“The term “funny” is the Swiss Army knife of humor, cutting through life’s dullness with its sharp edge of amusement. It’s that magical moment when words, images, or situations tickle your brain’s funny bone, sending your diaphragm into fits of uncontrollable laughter. Being funny is the art of catching people off guard, serving them a slice of the unexpected that’s been dipped in wit and deep-fried in irony. In essence, something’s funny when it’s an unexpected twist on the ordinary, packaged with a bow made of timing and delivery.”
Uuummmm, what? “dipped in wit and deep-fried in irony”?? That’s not funny, Chad-GPT. That’s lame. The opposite of funny. “dipped in wit and deep-fried in irony” is the name of a Florida community improv group. It’s a dad joke that didn’t even make it out of workshop. It sucks Chad.
By the way, I asked Google what it thought was funny and it just said, ‘BING’.
Solid burn, Google.
You can’t teach funny. To algorithms or to people. You’re either born with a talent for comedic timing and dry social commentary or you’re fucking not. Granted, occasionally the ability to make people laugh might get pounded into you by a class-based social system which permits some low-borns to rise up through the ranks if said LBs can suitably entertain the soulless aristocracy at the top; the prom queens, quarterbacks and Barrons sitting at a cool table they’ve neither earned nor appreciated. But that road is long, dangerous and filled with crossing chickens.
Anyway, the point is be funny if you can. Whenever you can. Have fun whenever you can. Get embarrassed. Take fucking risks. Do human shit. Because for all the hype and a $10 billion valuation, Chad-GPT and all the other AI’s out there are just dad jokes for the 21st-century.